Arise, Lord Ambrusias!
When Ambrusias the cat expired, the victim of an unfortunate collision with a speeding motor vehicle, his followers knew that his death was only temporary. They knew that, if they conducted the ritual properly, he would rise again. As he lay flattened and forgotten by all, save the turkey coven, in the middle of the street in a peaceful Boston neighborhood, they began to process in a circle around him, clucking in unison the spell of resurrection. The ritual would have to continue throughout the day and into the night. At the stroke of midnight, Ambrusias, or, as he was more commonly called by his humans, Bruce the housecat, would return from the dead.
Don’t listen to the wildlife experts who are claiming that this bizarre behavior by a flock of wild turkeys is mere wariness. Those people don’t know about Ambrusias or the religious order (Don’t you dare call it a cult!) he established amongst the turkey population of the Northeast. They don’t know that he prophesied his own death, darting in and out of traffic during daily rush hours, or that he vowed to be reborn, to prowl at night, to slake his unholy thirst on possums (NOT turkeys!) by night. They don’t know, and would not believe if they did. But the turkeys, they know…and they believe. Ambrusias will live again.