CSI: Vampire Hunters

On top of being addicted to an assortment of vampire TV shows, I am also a huge CSI junkie. Crime solving FTW! So when CSI: Crime Scene Investigation did an episode on vampires and werewolves, I was pretty excited (there may have been some girly squealing involved). In the episode Blood Moon the CSIs investigate a vampire and werewolf convention in order to solve the murder of one of its attendees - a vampire.

In spite of being excited for the episode, once I started watching I was instantly disappointed. I’m sorry CSI, I love you, but (most) vampire fans are not that cheesy and over-the-top. It was insulting how vampire fans were portrayed - dressed like tacky Victorians, red contacts, fake fangs… delusional and insane. Every “vampire” they interviewed was a giant sack of crazy. They acted as if they really were vampires, not just fans dressed as vampires. They  clearly weren’t sanguinarians, so I’m not sure what the writers were going for with these characters. It was the same deal with the werewolves, who of course, hated the vampires. Although, one werewolf claimed he transformed during the full moon. My best guess is that these guys were uberfans portraying vampires and werewolves in the most delusional and obsessive way. Overall, it was painfully unrealistic and lame.

The only thing that saved this episode for me was Dr. Langston (love him). The writers nailed the historical information behind vampires. Dr. Langston brought the show back to reality with his knowledge of science and history, saying just the right facts all throughout the episode. When he brought up porphyria I did a little happy dance (inside my head). Since I’m a huge fan of the history behind legends, hearing about it in Blood Moon made the episode for me.

“People invented stories about werewolves and vampires to explain the evil in the world, [they] couldn’t believe that people were capable of such terrible violence.” - Dr. Langston

- Moonlight