Romanian Hellcat Rips Off Husbands Gonads

Because I believe in being upfront with my loyal readers, I will tell you here, in the first sentence, that there are no vampires in this article. But I bet you’re gonna keep reading anyway, aren’t you? With a headline like that, how could you not? The only vampire-esque connection to the story is that it took place in Romania, the homeland of the historical Vlad Dracula and of all things vampiric. There’s blood in it, though, as there should be in any good vampire tale. Is it scary, though, you may ask? It is for the guys. Trust me on that one, ladies.

Ionel Popa neglected to get his wife of fifteen years, Marinela Benea (I suppose wives don’t take their husband’s last names in Romanian culture. Anybody know for sure?) flowers to celebrate International Women’s Day. Hey, *I* didn’t know guys were SUPPOSED to give their significant others flowers on this date. Then again, my better half and I don’t even celebrate Valentine’s, so maybe I’m just out of the loop. Or maybe it’s a Romanian thing? Who knows? Whatever the case, Ionel came home drunk and refused to help Marinela with the housework. So she grabbed his cajones and gave ‘em a yank. The linked article made no mention of divorce, so it would seem that Ionel is of the forgiving sort. VERY forgiving.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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