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Valentine’s Day Sucks

Valentine’s Day is almost here, and for some, it’s a dreadful day. Cutesy couples hanging all over each other, radio stations playing love songs all day and virtually every TV channel showing one romantic comedy after the other – it’s a bit sickening. For those of you who do not want to spend their day watching sappy movies, I suggest having a terrifying vampire themed movie day! Really make Valentine’s Day suck.

Here are a few V-Day movie suggestions:

John Carpenter’s Vampires
In this badass horror western, a vengeful vampire slayer must retrieve an ancient Catholic relic that, should it be acquired by vampires, will allow them to endure sunlight. Definitely not a romantic comedy.

30 Days of Night
Want a vampire film that will make you afraid to turn off the lights? I suggest 30 Days of Night, a terrifying and bloody film about an Alaskan town overrun with vampires after being plunged into darkness for a month.

Interview with the Vampire
Not a scary vampire movie, but definitely not a sappy romantic comedy – that’s for damn sure. Based on the influential novel by Anne Rice, Interview tells the life story of the vampire Louis.

Fright Night
A horrifying film about a teenager who finds out his next door neighbor is a bloodthirsty vampire. Both the original and the remake are fantastic.

Blade
The story of a half-human half-vampire badass who hunts down and destroys evil bloodsucking vampires. In this film, Blade, with the help of Whistler, must stop Frost, a vampire trying to take over the world. I’d love to spend the day of love with a brutal dhampir. I also suggest checking out Blade: Trinity, it’s bloody AND funny (don’t worry, there’s no romance).

Those are my recommendations for those who want a bloody and scary Valentine’s Day. What are your recommendations?

– Moonlight

30 days of nightbladeFright Nightinterview with the vampireJohn Carpenter's VampiresValentines Day

Moonlight • February 8, 2012


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  4. Novus Vox Vampirum February 8, 2012 - 8:33 pm Reply

    How about “Breaking Dawn Part I”, the least romantic “romance” movie imaginable? The shit starts to hit the fan even before E & B can finish their honeymoon.

    1. The bride has a vision of herself and her new husband atop a huge pile of dead, bloody bodies (who happen to be her friends and relatives!).
    2. Her life blood is being drained from the inside by her dhampir fetus. She becomes pale gray, suffers in extreme agony and experiences all the pain of human death and vampire regeneration.
    3. Shape-shifter “werewolves” want to kill her unborn child. Possibly including her bodyguard and best friend (until the magic-wand “imprinting” plot device takes effect).

    There was (maybe) about ten minutes of actual romance in this film. >;^)

    **************

    My choice for the perfect Valentine’s Day vampire movie is “Innocent Blood”.
    Marie (Anne Parillaud) is one of the sexiest film vampires ever.
    Her human boyfriend Joseph handcuffs her to the bed. (this scene is H-O-T!!)
    And their love for each other is 180-degrees opposite from sappy.

  5. Elyssa February 11, 2012 - 1:55 pm Reply

    I love vampires

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