What the Hell is Going on with the Castlevania Movie?

It’s time for another rant! Today I am bitching about the Castlevania movie, or rather, the lack of a Castlevania movie. If you are a long time reader then you may remember that this is not the first time I have pissed and moaned about this movie. Well, I’m doing it again, two years later. Why?  Because while scanning the interwebs for upcoming vampire films I came across Castlevania… again, and it is now slated to be released in 2014. Ugh!

Castlevania is one of the greatest video game franchises out there, so when it was announced WAY back in 2005 that a Castlevania film was in the works, fans of the games were beyond excited, myself included. Well, our excitement died over the many years of new producers, new directors, new writers… etc. Every time we think the film is actually getting made, the whole project is halted again for the billionth time. So seeing Castlevania back with a new 2014 release date does NOT make me happy, it pisses me off. They’re a bunch of filthy teases, and no one likes a tease.

Personally, I give up on the Castlevania movie. I don’t think it’s ever getting made. They keep pushing back the release date and not giving us any information at all. It angers me.

But if you’re one of those rare hopefuls that actually thinks this movie will come one day, well then, here is the totally outdated movie synopsis:

“The land of Transylvania has been at peace for 100 years now, and the peasants and villagers have begun to purge their minds of the memories of the times when the lands were dominated by chaos and shadows, and when the undead walked the earth…However, there are those that remember that the evil Count Dracula returns every 100 years to plague the land, bringing with him the forces of Hell…Thus, one evening, the King of Darkness rises and returns to Castlevania, his ancestral home, calling forth his minions to purge the world of human flesh. The people cry out for a hero — someone to defend them from the evil desires of the count.

Thankfully, they don’t have to look very far, for within the land of Transylvania the Belmont line still lives, as Simon Belmont, great-grandson of Christopher Belmont, takes up the legendary whip called the Vampire Killer, and sets forth on his journey through the darkened countryside to the dark lord’s castle…Upon arrival, the young man fights his way through legions of zombies, gigantic bats, and even faces Death himself, but in the end, he makes it to the Count and in a battle to end all battles, he comes out the victor…The price? The evil master places a curse of death upon Simon, which will lead him into a long and dangerous journey in the near future.”

What are your thoughts on the Castlevania movie? Do you think it will ever be made?

– Moonlight

By Moonlight

Moonlight (aka Amanda) loves to write about, read about and learn about everything pertaining to vampires. You will most likely find her huddled over a book of vampire folklore with coffee in hand. Touch her coffee and she may bite you (and not in the fun way).

7 comments

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  5. Uwe Boll hasn’t thrown his hat in the ring yet?

    Relatives of Ron Howard appearing in Vampire movies made in 2010:
    Twilight: Eclipse = Bryce Dallas Howard
    BloodRayne: The Third Reich = Clint Howard

    Final score:
    Uwe Boll = 1
    David Slade = 0

    >;^)

    1. If Uwe Boll signed on to direct “Castlevania”:
      The good news: He’d get it done, quickly.
      The bad news: He’d get it done, quickly.

      I must admit “Third Reich” was less cartoonish than the first two BloodRaynes, and if you’re gonna make b-movies anyway, you may as well have Clint Howard onscreen…

      “Castlevania” would be a first-class movie with the right A-list director at the helm.
      Like Moonlight, I’m not holding my breath, but I am holding onto my 8-bit Nintendo Castlevania cartridge… :^D

      1. Lol, ah, the good ol’ days of blowing into cartridges to make them play. I remember Castlevania was one of my first Nintendo games as a kid – and it scared the hell out of me haha.

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