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Candyman Yanked

You suck, Universal! Boo! Hiss! And again I say, you suck!

Things were just starting to, slowly, painfully, with baby steps, return to some semblance of normalcy. Theaters are back open. TENET, THE NEW MUTANTS, and UNHINGED all released as they were supposed to, and did well, relatively speaking. Why, why would you *now* choose to pull CANDYMAN from the calendar?!

The only explanation that I can think of isn’t a flattering one for you: greed. You saw the abridged amounts of dough that TENET and the others were bringing in, and while those still have the promise of bringing in more over the long haul, weekend by weekend, those numbers just weren’t big enough for your avaricious natures. Shame on you. Moreso than with any of the films that have released thus far, CANDYMAN had the potential to bring people back to theaters. It’s a movie that appeals to a niche market, though sizable and profitable it may be. Horror fans are the most loyal fans in the world. They would have come to see your movie. Oh, but you wanted more, didn’t you? You wanted the dilettante theater-goers, too, the teenagers with allowance money to spend, being sneaked into the theater by older friends while mommy and daddy sit home thinking they’re going to go see some PG romcom. Yeah, I know how your brains work, you suits in offices at Universal. Well, screw you.  

This news doesn’t have to be *that* bad for Horror flick fans, though. There are quite a few new independent Horror movies, some showing real promise, which will be releasing in time for Halloween. Just release *those* movies to theaters and drive-ins. That way, we’ll get our celluloid fix while we’re waiting for the big studios to stop shafting us.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless.

Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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