Goodbye, Zombie Cells!

Zah-om-om-bays! Zah-om-bays! Ay! Ay! Ay! Ay!

“Japanese Scientists Claim Vaccine Removes ‘Zombie’ Cells Behind ‘Aging-Related Diseases’”. So proclaims the headline of this linked article. We all know where this is going, don’t we? We’ve all seen that movie. The only thing remaining in question is whether this new vaccine will transform recipients into vampires, as the whole arresting of “aging-related” diseases is concerned, or whether it will leave them more brainless yet with a hankering for brains; zombies, in other words. If it’s a vampire vaccine, I’d be up for that. I wouldn’t really want to be a zombie, though. Not much glamor to being a zombie.

From the article: “According to…results, mice given the vaccine show decreased levels of senescent cells, aka ‘zombie cells,’ which accumulate with age… Senescent cells are defined as cells that, over time, stop dividing but do not die off. These cells begin to release harmful chemicals, damaging normal cells and causing inflammation. The vaccine reportedly creates antibodies that attach themselves to senescent cells, allowing them to be removed by white blood cells.”

Sounds promising. But I’m betting on zombies.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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