One of the special features included in the extended cut of HALLOWEEN KILLS, now available on Blu-ray and DVD, is a kill count. Before I watched it, though, I was keeping my own count, trying to see if I could keep up with the total number of people dispatched by Michael Myers in the film. Their count: 31. Mine was 35. We were both right. There were four firefighters killed offscreen. But it’s mentioned later on how many of them there were—11 I believe—and I counted the 4 they didn’t show getting killed. There were 31 onscreen kills, then, and 35 people total killed by Michael Myers. Although you could make an argument that the lady doctor with the gun shouldn’t count, as technically she killed herself. She shot herself. Michael kicked the car door, though, causing her to shoot herself, and they counted her death in the “kill count”, so I’ll count it as well.

If the doctor assisted in her own demise, though, the same could be said of Big John and Little John. They indirectly killed themselves by being stupid. Michael had every opportunity to kill them when he got into their—make that his—house. He didn’t. If they’d taken off right then and there and not decided to handle the problem themselves, if they’d ran across the street and called the cops instead of going upstairs after the intruder, they would have survived. Clearly Michael wasn’t interested in them. They were victims of the “people in Horror movies make poor decisions” trap. They chose poorly. Dumb move, guys.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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