I thought I was prepared. I wasn’t.

I went into Walmart minding my own business, intent on picking up a few sundries for home, when I caught a glimpse of it out of the corner of my eye. There it sat on the rack. It said RAGE OF THE MUMMY on the DVD case so I had no choice but to pick it up and examine it. Lo and behold, there were a few good reviews on the back, and a picture of the titular Mummy, which looked cool. I really had no choice then but to buy it, to take it home and pop it into the ol’ DVD player. I thought I was ready. I’d seen, and loved, THE ROOM. I’d seen THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS, a whole slew of MST3K features, and the entire body of work of Ed Wood (excepting the pornos). I thought I was ready, but nothing, nothing could have prepared me for RAGE OF THE MUMMY.

This micro-budget feature was written, produced, edited, scored, etc. all by one guy, Dennis Vincent, and if that puts you in mind of the aforementioned auteur extraordinaire Ed Wood, you’re on the right track. How cheap was this one? So cheap they couldn’t even afford to film the kill scenes! Instead all the violence, and much of the transitioning action, is revealed via the pages of a comicbook, ala CREEPSHOW. (The comics and animation are also done by Mr. Vincent—who ALSO plays the part of the Mummy!) The acting is every bit as bargain basement as the FX, with the exception of the mask for the Mummy, which as I said is pretty rad (although we need not mention the rest of the Mummy costume, or the props, or…)

RAGE OF THE MUMMY is soooooooooooo lousy…that it’s brilliant. I loved it. And if you have a soft spot in your wizened little hearts for this sort of fare, you’re guaranteed to love it, too.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless.

Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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