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Movie Review: SLENDER MAN

Let me quote from a previous article I wrote for this site concerning this movie: “Why would [Sony] take a guaranteed moneymaker and then try to deliberately scrap it…? We know there have been some backstage rumblings…talk of ship-jumping and that maybe Sony wouldn’t end up distributing the film after all, as the producers were not pleased with Sony’s marketing strategy. In short, Sony wasn’t willing to give the movie the push the producers wanted. Does this explain Sony’s…decision to move the opening for the film from August 24th, when it would have had little competition…? There’s more going on here than we’ve heard about. It’s as if Sony doesn’t WANT the movie to turn a profit.”

Okay, yes, there WAS more going on than we had heard. And I owe Sony an apology. It all makes sense now. The behind-the-scenes bickering, the scheduling change, Sony’s lack of enthusiasm. It’s all because SLENDER MAN is a piece of detritus. One of the worst Horror flicks to come down the pipes in quite some time. Sony knew they had a steaming sewage-burger on their hands. THAT is why they were trying to sweep it under the rug.

I’m sorry, Sony. You were right to try to distance yourself from this one. I’m surprised you even released it at all. (Sounds like you didn’t want to, and that’s understandable.)

Looking back on it, it seems obvious that this project was doomed to failure. A movie based on an Internet wiki. Yeah, how could that possibly NOT have worked?

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763

MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!

TheCheezman • August 17, 2018


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