My Philia Returns

I’ve written before about what I jokingly (well, mostly I’m joking) call my philia. My fetish. Hot chicks in monster makeup. I’ve explained that there’s nothing necrophilic about it. In order for my buttons to get pushed I have to know there’s a perfectly living and physically attractive female beneath the monster makeup. The makeup just enhances what’s underneath. Got it? No? Some of you? Whatevs. It’s *my* fetish. Y’all don’t have to understand it. Some guys get turned on by a pair of ladies penny-loafers. Ain’t my place to judge.

Recently while visiting my local and just opened Spirit Halloween store, it happened again. I turned around and there she was on a big cardboard advertisement. Emily from THE CORPSE BRIDE. Rather a woman dressed up as Emily from THE CORPSE BRIDE. Whoa, mama!

I don’t know the model in the photograph. If I were to see her out of the makeup, I’m sure I’d think she was an attractive woman. But doubtless she wouldn’t have rocked my world. I see lots of beautiful women and my world remains largely un-rocked. But dress any one of ‘em as a cartoon zombie, or a non-cartoon zombie, and all bets are off.

If I weren’t already taken, Corpse Bride, I’d totally meet you at the undead altar.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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