Fox News recently had their sex expert blog about why we seem to love the idea of vampire sex so much. She took a look into the attraction and came up with these reasons behind our leechy lust: they’re hot, they’re kinky, they’re into S&M, they scare us, they tease us, they do the walk of shame for us, they make us beg and, they never die. She made excellent points, but I think she missed a few. Let me break it all down for you…
Damn near every book, movie and show portrays vampires as super sexy undead creatures. I mean, who would turn an ugly person into a vampire, that would just be mean. So chances are your seductive vampire will be a sexy one.
Have you ever seen a really dirty vampire sex scene in a movie? It’s full of frenzy, crazy lust and lots of biting. It’s not your simple boring missionary position, it full out wild sex.
They’re into S&M
Of course there would be a but of pain mixed in with your pleasure. Picture a hot vamp roughly pinning you down and biting you as he continues to have is naughty way with you. Fun right? Yea it is.
They scare us
Having a powerful and scary being take control is a thrill for humans. We like a bit of fear mixed in, it makes it all so much more exciting and exhilarating for us. Look at all the trill seekers out there, people that skydive, race cars and such, it’s scary and it’s a hell of a rush.
They tease us
As the blogger said, it’s all about the initial seductive. The passion that sets your imagination on fire, causing all sorts of curious and lust-filled thoughts. It’s like foreplay for the mind.
They do the walk of shame
Since they have to be gone before the sun rises you don’t have to worry about that awkward moment the next morning.
They make us beg
They take total control and go for all of our sensitive spots. Kissing and biting lightly on your neck will make anyone go wild and willing to beg for more.
They never die
They’re mysterious and incredible supernatural creatures. They’re so much more than a simple man. Never dying puts them a step above and makes them superior in so many ways.
And that concludes the list the blogger made. Some things I would add in are…
They are centuries old and you better believe they have mastered their sex skills throughout the years. Sex with a vampire wouldn’t be like with a mortal man. There was be any clumsiness or failed techniques; with an experienced vamp it will be perfect, he’ll know every sweet spot to hit and every way to make you scream.
Over the years they have practiced the art of romance. They know the methods to use to make you swoon and make your heart skip a few beats.
What about you guys? Why do you want to sex up a hot little piece of undead ass?