Pattinson Pans *Those* Movies

Rumor has it there’s a new TWILIGHT book out. To quote Garfield the Cat, “big fat hairy deal.”

Alright, alright. I know some of you out there will care. (Xenu only knows *why* you’d care.) The book is called MIDNIGHT SUN and it’s a rewrite of the original TWILIGHT from the sparkly Romeo’s point of view. (Wow. The originality of thought on display, there.) Keeping the udders of that cash cow firmly in hand, author Stephenie Meyer has also said she might do another couple of books in the series. Yoink, yoink. Cue the sound of milk squirting into a tin bucket. There, Twi-hards. It’s news, so I reported on it.

Now let’s talk about Robert Pattinson, who is to be our next Batman and who has left all things sparkly so far behind him that he hardly seems to be the same person. The dude hasn’t been shy about voicing his opinion on the whole TWILIGHT experience. He walked out of the movie’s premiere because he thought it was so bad. And as far as the source material goes, he said, and this is a direct quote, “When I read [the book] it felt like a book that shouldn’t have been published.” Damn. I mean, I agree. 100%. But damn. Somebody get Stephenie Meyer some ointment for that burn. Pattinson has also said that, had he not been cast in the movies, he would (another direct quote, here) “just mindlessly hate it without having seen [it].” Hey, there’s nothing “mindless” about having a modicum of taste, Rob. Nothing at all. He won me over with his abilities, but I like the guy more every time he rips on TWILIGHT. Dude after my own heart.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless.

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