Revisiting the “Classics”: CREATURE (with Klaus Kinski)
This one is not to be confused with the fantastic CREATURE from 2011, the one with the half-man, half-crocodile monster, the one that for a time held the record for the lowest box office opening in history (it may still hold it) but is nevertheless ridiculously entertaining. It also is not the made-for-television miniseries entitled CREATURE from 1998, the one featuring a half-man, half-shark. Hey, they should do a movie where those two monsters fight! CREATURE VS. CREATURE! They could even throw in the monster from the 1985 flick CREATURE, the one this post is actually about. CREATURE VS. CREATURE VS. CREATURE. If they did, though, people would be wondering how the Alien Xenomorph got into the picture, because the titular creature in 1985’s CREATURE is a blatant Alien rip-off.
In fact the whole movie is a blatant rip-off of both ALIEN and THE THING. With a budget of about ten dollars (in 80s money), its production values make your typical SyFy original look like a $200-million tentpole. Even so, it manages to be fun. It qualifies for mention here because the Alien, I mean the creature, turns several humans into zombies by implanting parasites on their brains, so zombies, but also because it features Klaus (NOSFERATU) Kinski in one of the countless forgettable roles he took that were a complete waste of his abilities. He was bad about that. Long before Nicholas Cage, Kinski was taking any old role that came along, no matter how lousy the script. The script for CREATURE isn’t really that bad, not like so many of the scripts for Kinski’s films, but its derivativeness and cheapness somewhat lower it to that standard.
WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763
MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!