Revisiting the (Not-So) Classics: FRIDAY THE 13th

This one was on cable the other night at a time when I plopped down in front of the television with a few minutes to kill. I figured, what the heck, I hadn’t seen it in a few years so I’d give it a rewatch. Mistake. Shouldn’t have. It left me feeling pissed off. Again. Same way I felt back in 2009 when I saw this one in the theater.

The reboot of FRIDAY THE 13th is the worst kind of bad movie. The kind that *could* have been good. Nothing is uglier than squandered potential. They tried to do some novel things with Jason. A Jason who is more of a survivalist, who wields a bow and arrow, who kidnaps as well as slashes and is more demonstrably sadistic, more physical and less phantasmal. If only they’d employed a smidgen of that originality with any of the other characters. The lead guy and the survivor girl are okay, but egads the victims! It’s like they set out to make them as idiotic and insipid as possible. That might have worked if they’d been making a parody, but they were playing it straight, and the end result is a movie that is at times unwatchable.

The movie was directed by the same guy who helmed the 2003 reboot of THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE, which was alright, and the script was written by the guys who wrote the screenplay for FREDDY VS. JASON, which was frankly pretty damn epic, so there’s no excuse for them just phoning it in the way they did with this one.  The fact that they never made a sequel to this one, even back when they could have, says all that needs saying about the way the creators wrapped this property around a tree. Shame on them, because it didn’t have to be that way.

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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