True Blood Season 2 Premier!

Oh my god! Season 2 Premier! Like, yaaaay! How many of you could have just died when you found out they were going to be making more True Blood? I don’t know about you, but I almost had an epileptic episode. A word of warning; for those of you who read the books, or are…

Season 1, Episode 12 of True Blood

This is it folks, the season finale! Which means this synopsis might be really damn long, or really damn short. But either way, my next synopsis will be the premier of True Blood’s second season. Jason sits in his jail cell dealing out all of his possessions, his jacket to Hoyt, the house, money and…

Season 1, Episode 11 of True Blood

We open up on Bill digging a grave for Jessica, who lies nearby, recently ex-sanguinated, while Pam pokes and prods, and checks the panties of his new friend. Bill gets frustrated and tells Pam to leave her alone, and the two get into a long, existential argument about the lives of vampires. Pam is all…

TrueBlood, Season 1, Episode 10

Sam wakes up to a screaming Sookie, and the sexy naked bar owner flops around for a moment before Sookie settles far away, and tells him to leave; very loudly. While Sam tries to explain, Sookie misunderstands, and thinks Sam is the murderer, before she clocks him one, and takes off to hide in the…

True Blood Season 1, Episode 9

We open up where we left off in episode 8, –with a very pissed off Longshadow ready to choke the life out of Sookie; Bill’s fangs extend, while Eric watches solemnly, and Pam rolls her eyes at his side, at Ginger’s high pitched, continuous shrieking. Pam tells her “enough!” and Eric politely says ‘Thank you”,…

True Blood, Season 1, Episode 8

We open where we left off in episode 7, with Sookie staring shocked at the four coffins, blackened by the flames that the surrounding firemen have just quelled. Sheriff Bud Dearborn asks Sookie if she’s okay, and if she wants water; she asks if they’re sure, did they find four bodies? Detective Andy Bellefleur says…

True Blood Season 1, Episode 7

We open where we left off; a very, very close up shot of Bill slurping and sucking on Sookie’s neck. We’re still being shown Sookie and Bill’s mid-coital mambo, which means more boobs, and a good shot of Bill’s rather feminine butt. Apparently, this is the exact moment of penetration; I suppose to any virgin,…

True Blood Season 1, Episode 6

We return to the scene of poor sweet Gran, lying dead in a sticky pool of blood on her kitchen floor. Sookie, completely shocked is grabbed by Bill, and turned from the scene. Sam enters and Bill is immediately defensive, due to the bloody scene in front of him; thinking that Sam might be the…

True Blood, Season 1, Episode 5

We’re back, finally, after a week of waiting, to Sookie and Bill’s magical car ride home. As you’ll recall, Bill and Sookie met a policeman on the road, whom Bill scared bad enough, to make him pee his pants. Poor feller. Bill and Sookie sit in the car and Sookie berates him for his treatment…

True Blood, Season 1, Episode Four

And we’re back, right where we left off, with Sookie screaming her head off after finding the body of her coworker, Dawn. This is a stressful situation, so it’s a little surprising that she doesn’t turn the alarm clock off; considering it’s the first thing any of us would do. Imagine, dead body of co-worker,…