real vampires, vampire games and tv shows, movies, and vampire books

The Bloodbath Mat

Genius! It’s a cottony white bathmat that, when you step on it, leaves bright, bloody footprints! I don’t know how it works, but it must react with water. It changes color when it gets wet, like those color-changing Hot Wheels cars. I must have one!

Wait, what? It doesn’t do that? The bloody footprints are printed on the mat? They’re always there, whether the towel is wet or dry? Well, phooey! The video I saw on Facebook made it look like they appeared as if by magic on the mat when you stepped out of the shower onto it. Bummer.

It’s still cool. Just not as cool. If you paired it with the bloody handprint shower curtain for a matching set–it’d still be overpriced. Just being honest. If the bloody red coloration really did appear only when the mat gets wet, that’d be one thing. For a simple printed bathmat? I’d have a hard time justifying turning loose of that much cash, even if the mat is being offered for a “limited time discount price!” and you can “BUY 2 MATS GET FREE SHIPPING!” and “BUY 3 MATS GET 1 FREE!”

If I were an inventor, I’d create that color-changing bloody bathmat. And if any of you inventors out there decide to do it, I expect a cut of the profits. Since I came up with the idea and all.

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS (www.evilcheezproductions.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/evilcheezproductions), specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced and directed (and occasionally acted in) over a dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and Crime genres. His first novel, THE CONFESSIONS OF SAINT CHRISTOPHER: WEREWOLF, is available for purchase here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/734763

MORTUI VELOCES SUNT!

TheCheezman • March 9, 2018


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