True Blood, Season 3 Episode 1
It’s been a long, long time gone, –and finally, I can do my little ‘Bad Things’ chair dance again. I can’t tell you the relief involved in watching the newest episode of True Blood, but then again, you know what it’s like, because you were there! From now on, my synopses are going to be more like summaries, –so hang on for a shorter, more abbreviated ride. We’re getting back to the story just as it left off; Sookie can’t find Bill, Tara is losing it after Jason shoots Eggs, believing he’s attacking Andy, Jessica is dealing with a trucker-corpse, Jason and Andy are trying to keep their story straight, and thank god, they had a season 2 recap, otherwise, we’d be totally lost in a stream of Bon Temps insanity.
After Bill’s kidnapping, not too many people are interested in helping her find him, –and Eric is pre-occupied with vampire politics, but finding, and disposing of Bill was originally his intention. However, it seems that someone else got there first. We just don’t know how, –even though Bill eventually escapes from his car-load of psychotic werewolves, he’s still lost in Mississippi. Tara on the other hand, finds no comfort in Sookie, since it was Sookie who let Eggs know what actually happened, –likewise, Sookie finds no comfort in Tara, who now hates her because she believes she’s at fault for Eggs’ death.
Tara ends up leaning on her mother, or at least appearing to, but then, at the last moment, decides to gobble pills in Lafayette’s bathroom by the handful. Jason is spazzing out because he’s just murdered a man, although Andy is adamant about keeping what really happened under wraps. In an effort to remain ‘normal’ he tries to go back to his old manwhoring ways, but no cigar, –and Hoyt, who now lives with Jason, is too broke up over he and Jessica’s problems, to really be interested in having sex with drunken college girls. Did I mention Eric?
Maybe I didn’t mention that Eric is having a bunch of problems with the vampire queen of Louisiana, especially after his failed attempt at dealing with Bill. But the Queen seems to have her own problems, –with the IRS, oh, and the Magister, –who apparently outranks the Queen. It seems the Queen is going broke, and needs the money from a massive sale of vampire blood, and she’s under major pressure from the Magister as well, who is picking up on the bad vibes over in Eric’s area. The amounts of V being sold to humans is higher in Eric’s area than any other, placing him under the scrutiny of higher powers.
Of course, this affects Lafayette, who is now being forced by Eric and Pam to ‘move the product’ and sells a huge amount of V overnight. But the one person we’ve neglected to mention so far here, is Sam, who is still on the hunt for his birth family, the Mickens. He’s also having some really weird, gay sex dreams about Bill. Sure, it’s nice to throw a bone to the gay audience, but… Bill and Sam? Meh… It just seems awkward for two straight guys to be all awkwardly romantic. Despite his weird nightly episodes, Sam perseveres, and manages to find the Mickens. In the next episode, we can definitely expect more madness, confrontation, and sexy men doing sexy things to some extremely sexy females. Oh and ladies… can I get a big HELL YES! for getting another look at Eric’s purty ass? Yeah, I thought so.
Previews for next week’s episode: Beautifully and Broken