“What are you?!” “I’m Camazotz.”

First off, that picture. I have my doubts as to its authenticity. The Mesoamerican bat-headed god Camazotz is real, though. That is to say, he is a real figure in Mayan mythology. The ancient Mayans believed he was real. As to whether or not he was literally, physically real, the same rule applies to him as applies to all gods: it comes down to a matter of faith. I do not, however, have much faith in that photograph. As to the claims put forward by this website that Camozotz was the inspiration for Batman, um, horseshit.

Okay, okay. Actually the photo of the Camazots Batman armor is real. But it’s modern real. It’s the creation of an artist named Christian Pacheco. It’s wicked cool, but it isn’t an authentic piece of Mayan artwork. I dig it, though.

Hey, I’ve got an idea! If we are in fact going to end up with Robert Pattinson as our new cinematic Batman (it’s not official yet!), the studio is gonna need all the help it can get getting the guy over, making audiences forget that he once played a pimply sparkly pseudo-vampire. He’s gonna need gravitas. They ought to spraypaint that Camazotz suit black and use it for the next movie. Instant intimidation factor!

By TheCheezman

WAYNE MILLER is the owner and creative director of EVIL CHEEZ PRODUCTIONS, specializing in theatrical performances and haunted attractions. He has written, produced, and directed (and occasionally acted in) over two dozen plays, most of them in the Horror and True Crime genres. He obtained a doctorate in Occult Studies from Miskatonic University and is an active paranormal investigator. Is frequently told he resembles Anton Lavey. And Ming the Merciless. Denn die totden reiten schnell!

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